I pulled her close and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. She smiled and walked out the door. I closed it behind her. I walked into the sitting room where Bill was flung on the couch with his ear phones on, scribbling furiously on a notepad. He glanced up at me and gave me a sarcastic smirk. I whipped off his earphones. Bill, what the hell is up with you? Its like you have been sulking ever since Poppy came over. I growled. Oh. Was she here? I hadnt even noticed. he said sourly. Dont give me that bullshit! You always do that! What the fuck kind of problem do you have with Poppy, or any of the girlfriends I have had? Bills eyes narrowed. You are such an asshole he said. He pulled his earphones from my hands and pushed passed me. He went to his room and slammed the door. I fell into the couch and sighed. My hand brushed off something cold. I picked it up. It was Bills notepad. Before I had time to look at it, Bill lunged at me and yanked it out of my hands. Without one word he promptly ran back to his room. What the hell was that? I thought. He is really starting to scare me I knocked on Bills door. Go away! came his voice from the other side. I rolled my eyes and walked to my room.
I lay on my bed thinking about Bill. I had no idea what was wrong with him. He is so distant and he has started keeping to himself a lot. He wont even talk to Gustav or Georg. We cant get anything out of him. He just shrugs everyone off and sulks. The only time he will show any emotion is when he is angry with me. Which, it seems lately, to be all the time. I wish I knew what I had done to make him so angry. I had to find out.
I lingered outside Bills door, trying to gather the courage to knock. When Bill was angry with me it made me nervous to talk to him. Any fight we ever had never lasted long and we had never held any lasting grudges. But then I was dealing with a different Bill. He had changed. He was not the Bill that I had grown up with. He was not my twin brother any more. He was this angry, depressed person, who didnt talk. He barely even existed and I was getting worried. I tapped lightly on his door. Go away! he shouted once again. Bill I will not go away! I yelled back Whether you like it or not I am coming in and we are going to talk!
The door opened slowly after a few minutes. I walked in and the lock clicked quietly as I closed the door. The room was dark. The only light came from a small parting at the window where the curtain didnt close properly. I felt around the wall for the light switch. I flicked it on. Bill was sitting on his bed with his head in his hands. Bill? Why were you sitting in the dark? I asked quietly as I sat beside him. He didnt answer and just shook his head. Bill. I said sternly Bill, look at me. He turned away and sighed. Bill, whats wrong with you? You are not acting like yourself and you are making everybody really worried I softly placed my hand on his knee. He sprang up and backed away from me. Whats wrong? I asked, completely stunned by his action. He shook his head. I stood up and walked closer to him. With every step I took he would take one backward until he backed himself into a corner. Whats going on with you Bill? Youre really scaring me now I insisted. He kept his head hung low and sighed. I caught his chin gently and lifted his head so I could look at him properly for the first time since I had set foot in his room. His eyes were swollen, blood shot and red. His cheeks were damp and flushed. Bill, were you crying? I asked. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. I began to lift my arms to hug him, but he slipped away from me and turned his back to me again. Listen Bill, I said just louder than a whisper Im not going to force you to say anything, but I am really worried about you. Youre my brother and---well......at least you were. I honestly dont know who you are anymore. But if you ever want to talk, you know I am just next door. Bill, I love you and I can see that you are hurting yourself. Please, come find me when you are ready to talk. He didnt say a word as I left. If I wasnt mistaken I swear could hear soft sobs coming from the room as I closed the door.
I hope he comes to me....................before he hurts himself.